She’s incredibly patient, but doesn’t have a lot of tolerance for bad behavior. She’ll only keep you around if the relationship is a good thing for both her and her kids. (Balls joke avoided.) The sitter may bail on her, her kid may come down with the flu, she may just need to lay down for a while because trying to be Wonder Woman when you don't actually have superpowers is really fucking exhausting. She probably can't drop everything and hop on a plane to Ibiza with you, and her schedule is probably measurably more complex than that of someone who is flying solo. Not only do they have life experience to bring to the table but boy, do they know how to make the most of an evening. Body-glossing, outfit-finding, baby-sitter ordering , instructions leaving. To you – no big deal, we’ll just reschedule another time!The men I’d normally take an interest in are often just starting their careers, still in undergrad, or staying out until 3AM every chance they get—whereas I’m living the opposite lifestyle, and as a party of two, not one. In spite of this barrage of challenges, I still have hope.And let’s not forget that I’m just a theme song word for word, but couldn’t for the life of me name ONE song from Kanye’s latest album. I mean, if I can manage to balance everything life throws my way while parenting an infant at my young age, I can certainly handle dating. Still, to sharpen my skills before heading into the trenches, I asked a few experts for advice on navigating the dating scene as a single 20-something mom. Sure, it used to seem like great fun to get tipsy and swipe right on potential hookups less than 10 miles away—20, if he or she is really hot—but apps like Tinder are more likely to land just that: A hookup and not a serious dating candidate.Dating is one thing, but dating a single mom requires a new skill set. True, she's a woman and wants to be seen as that but she's also a mother and she needs to be seen as that, too.
Upside: You’ll have plenty of time to maintain your own friendships and hobbies, instead of becoming one of those obnoxious enmeshed couples who have forgotten they are not, in fact, surgically attached.2. Want to know the fastest way to end your relationship with a single mom? Not only were they in her life first, but she’s the reason they exist at all. They’re not an inconvenience and they are definitely not your competition. Would you really want a woman who let some new person — even one as rad as you — take precedence over her kids? It’s something to be admired, even if it didn’t end up the way anyone had planned.
Real talk: Considering the 200 different directions I’m pulled in each day—which include working full time; waking up with my six-month-old daughter at ungodly hours; cooking; cleaning; carpooling; bathing; co-parenting; dealing with temper tantrums; and still attempting to take care of myself—the mere of dating can sometimes seem nothing short of impossible.
Not to mention that in the rare and precious moments I do have to myself, it feels like a major risk to spend that time with someone I might never see again rather than catching up with friends, reading, zoning out to Netflix, or, you know, sleeping.
But, believe it or not, not all of us single moms are recent divorcées scrolling through silver fox profiles on Match.
There are plenty, like me, who are blissfully lacking in life experience, have yet to reach the big 3-0, and spend more time swiping left on Tinder instead.